Isn't it ironic...

Hello my faithful readers:

It's been waaaaaaaaaaaaaay too long since I've written here. I have to say as far as my dating life is concerned I simply have ignored it completely. Lately all I can think about is my huge running to-do list which includes my visa application (lengthy process folks!), wrapping up my final big project at work (Bonnaroo happening all next week) and packing/selling the 9 years of accumulated life here in NYC (did I mention I'm a bit of a pack rat?!?!). I type this all as I'm thinking about my ever growing list of the dozen other things I need to accomplish in the next day or two.

What has been going on for me in the dating world? Well... most recently I had been e-mailing with Bachelor #1 and I'd even gotten to the point where we'd exchanged numbers. He called me Memorial Weekend and I never called him back. I know totally rude of me right? I hated doing that, but I realized I just don't have the energy, nor the time to really truly focus on getting a new friendship started. I barely have time lately to keep up with the few friends I already have! Many of you haven't seen me in several months, simply because I'm running around crossing things off my to-do list.

That very next week, all within a couple of days of each other I received e-mails from 3 different men whom I'd dated or corresponded with at some point in the past couple of years (Mr. Ex was one of them) and the emails made me wonder - why now? I thought I'd closed the door on all of those friendships and seeing those e-mails for me was like having a big fancy picnic (MY BIG FANCY PICNIC) ruined by ants showing up and walking all over my food. My reactions to the notes ranged from"who is this?" to "slightly guilty because the tone of his e-mail seemed so delusional (to me)."

Now none of these men had any idea that they would all contact me within days of each other, but in situations like this one I am always reminded of the Alanis Morrisette song "Ironic." Hearing from a few old flames in the span of a week (ok I might be exaggerating by labeling them old flames) almost never happens (for me). Let's be real. Who am I kidding here? I'm not hearing from much of anyone lately. Personally I found getting all of these notes just as I was starting to mentally get "closure" on "life in NYC" a little unsettling. I have to admit that hearing from them all put me in a little bit of a funk for a few days (ok it was really a full week and a half), because I was reminded of all of my dating disappointments. I (always) need to believe that there has to be some higher purpose, but perhaps the purpose is just to toughen me up for the next leg of my journey. OR it could be that I'm reading too much into this and I just need to remained focused on the goal (getting ready for school in the fall).

I'm still determining the fate of my blog, because as much as I love sharing my dating journey with you all; I'm embarking on a different journey now and this means less activity on this blog (which has been dedicated to chronicling my dating adventures). Things are busy for me at work (at least until June 15th when I return from Bonnaroo) and I have less time to focus on coming up with interesting topics related to my dating life. You might not hear from me for a while, but I promise that I'll try to keep you posted on any possible dating adventures I have while abroad. Finding love is still a (big) priority for me, but for the duration of my MBA program (1 year) it won't be my primary focus.

Thanks for all of the love and support over the past couple of months. I really appreciate all of the advice, encouragement and love you guys have shown. I plan on enjoying my last month couple of months here in NYC. For those of you who don't live here there is NOTHING like NYC in the spring/summer. I love it! I hope that you have a wonderful summer too!

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

The opposite of love

Hello my faithful readers:

I can't believe how quickly this year is flying by - it's already May! What a difference a few months makes; I'm still pinching myself because in a few months I'll be a full time student for the first time in almost 9 years. Yesterday I made a big commitment (scary for me) by putting my 25% non-refundable deposit down for my MBA program in the fall. I'm very thankful that I had the resources to make the payment with out too much strain (although I was really hoping for more favorable exchange rates). Work is busy again and although I'm glad to have a real, tangible project to focus on (after so many months of downtime), I wish I could just focus on getting my personal to-do list done. Does that make me selfish?

Yesterday I was listening to The Steve Harvey Morning show and he had Delilah (one of the most successful syndicated radio hosts in the US apparently) who had written a book about love. Delilah said something that rocked me to my core. The opposite of love is NOT hate. What????!?
This made me turn my radio up a little louder to hear the rest of what she had to say. Delilah says that to hate someone you have to like them at least a little bit, otherwise you really don't muster up enough energy to "hate" them. In other words if you didn't have some sort of "like/passion" for them then you would not expend the energy to "hate" them.

What Delilah said next surprised me. She said that the opposite of love is SELFISHNESS. Again I was rocked to my very core, because I have been accused of being SELFISH (by my Mom) before. Delilah says that sometimes in love you have to make sacrifices and change your plans to meet the needs of your mate. I'll admit that this is one of my biggest problems (fears) with getting into a committed relationship. I see the sacrifices that my mom, friends and others make for love. Some of them I agree with, but some leave me scratching my head thinking I don't think I could have done that. Like a (spoiled) only child sometimes I happen to think the world revolves around me. Delusional much?

This got me thinking about my decision to move to Belgium for grad school. I know that my family would rather I not move so far away to do it, but I believe it's something I believe I HAVE to do. Does this make me selfish? I've made lots of big decisions in life with only one person in mind before - ME! But now I am wondering if the big problem in my dating life is actually me. Am I (cock) blocking myself from finding the love that (I say) I want?

Here's what my (delusional) self thinks about my current situation. I understand what a real, loving relationship should be and I refuse to settle for less. When the right person comes along who deserves my focus, dedication and sacrifice I will adjust my behavior accordingly. Until then I reserve the right to be (a little) selfish. At this point in my life, I believe I haven't met THE ONE who deserves my focus, dedication and sacrifice. But I'll hold out hope that we'll find each other soon (because beneath my tough exterior) I am a big, romantic at heart. Ok, ok, ok... maybe that's really deep down inside, but really I do believe that there is love out there for us all. I just have to remember what the real opposite of love is so that I don't do it when love finally comes my way.

I'm curious to hear your thoughts on this subject. Do you agree that the opposite of love is selfishness? I think I will check out Delilah's book because I'd love to hear more about her thoughts on the subject of LOVE. I am inspired to get back into the groove again (I had started feeling sorry for myself), but until then I think I'll go check out a few new handbags at my friend Mrs. Handbags special shopping event today from 6-8 pm. Retail therapy always improves my mood. Let me know if you'd like to join me if you're here in NYC.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

He wasn't man enough for me

Hello my faithful readers:

After such a BEAUTIFUL weekend, I'm savoring the great weather we're having here in NYC this week. Work is still a little nutty because I'm only in the office a couple of times this week. Tomorrow I head to Manchester, TN to do a site check; on Friday I'll be heading home to Georgia to hang with the family and watch my baby sister graduate from Pharmacy School (finally we have a Doctor in the family)! :o)

Here's a quick update on the date on Saturday with Mr. Ex - we finally mutually agreed (OK I made it VERY CLEAR) that we probably are better off remaining friends. I'm glad that we spent the day together because we've only hung out in 2-3 hour increments, before our marathon date on Saturday. Spending the day with a person really makes a difference and I am quite happy that we did it. It was a good test and I realize now that there were a few (BIG) things about him that I tended to ignore before because I only saw the behavior occasionally within our 2-3 hour dates.

We met up at Central Park and I have to say that it was a great day to be in the park (the weather was gorgeous) and I don't think I've ever seen so many people there before. We started to walk a little deeper into the park and a dog barks at him as we walk by. I have NEVER seen a man jump out of his skin as much as he did. From that moment on I was watching a little more closely because I thought he's scared of a dog? While we were walking through the park, I took the opportunity to ask a few more questions about him and I finally asked what his mysterious 2nd part-time job was and he grudgingly admitted that he's a barista (for Starbucks). He says he is planning to quit this job soon, but if he needs to make his bills who am I to judge? I recognize that times are hard for lots of people right now.

After spending several hours in the park and talking we headed down to Soho for some pizza at Lombardi's. This is where I realized that the coy behavior he'd exhibited before (calling me the boss and saying that whatever I wanted was what he wanted) drove me absolutely nutty. Here's a little sample of our dialogue at dinner:

Me: Do you like pizza?

Him: I like whatever you like

Me: What kind of pizza do you like?

Him: I like whatever you like, you're the boss!

Me: Do you drink soft drinks? If so what kind because I was thinking we could order a pitcher together?

Him: I drink them sometimes, I'll drink whatever you want to order.

After dealing with this type of exchange all day (even putting together what we were going to do for the day went that way), I just couldn't take it anymore. I ordered the meal when he was in the bathroom and decided I'd just grin and bear it for the rest of the date. I asked him some questions one of which was why he thought I should get into a relationship with him. Although his answer was not bad "Because I'll never disappoint you," his demeanor during this talk bothered me a lot. It's something I'd noticed before, but ignored. He covered his mouth with both his hands when he talked to me about anything serious and averted his eyes to some point behind me (and off to the side). Both of these body language tells REALLY bother me because when I speak to a person I like to make direct eye contact and covering your mouth indicates that you're not being totally honest.

After a yummy pepperoni pizza, I suggested we walk around a little bit more. We walked down towards Canal Street and then back up to the village. I was a little quiet throughout the day, but I would point out interesting landmarks for him and whenever I had a question I'd ask. As we were walking back up to the West Village he mentioned for the umpteenth time that if I was tired we could head in (I told him a few times earlier that day I'd let him know when I was ready to head in). At that point I said "OK" and headed for the train station.

It was at the train where he asked for a kiss instead of just giving one. For me it wasn't really that he asked, but it was more of how he asked that rubbed me the wrong way. I think by this point if he'd just leaned in and given me a kiss I would have appreciated it more than him trying to negotiate a kiss out of me on the subway platform. I guess in the end it was really just a matter of timing. So he's following me as I'm headed down the stairs to the F train and we had a really awkward kiss on the stairwell. He made the comment that "someone" needs kissing lessons. My retort was "Yep, someone definitely needs lessons after that one."

I got home and later he called and left me a voicemail message saying he would leave me alone, but wanted to ask me some questions before he did. Then about 10-15 minutes later he called me and told me he'd lost his car keys somewhere. I helped him to call the restaurant with no luck and I think he ended up taking another bus back to his apartment. He found the keys the next day, but thankfully I never had to answer his questions.

All in the date wasn't bad, but I realized that I can't date someone that bothers me this much if we hang out for more than a couple of hours. I know this probably sounds arrogant, but he truly wasn't a good match for me because he just isn't at my level. I've mentioned it here before, but it was made clear by our date on Saturday. I have a strong personality and I need someone who has an equally strong personality that's a compliment to my own (strong personality). I can't date someone who continues to "Yes" me to death or can't even look me in the eye when we're having serious conversation. And let's be real here -- I'm a tall girl with sturdy bone structure. If I feel like I'm the protector in the relationship then the dude isn't man enough for me (I honestly think that's why I love really tall men).

I'm out of the office on Wednesday and Friday, but I'll try to write a little something for Thursday. Have a great week otherwise.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

Wasted time

Hello my faithful readers:

I hope that you're surviving the ups and downs we're having with the weather. Yesterday here in NYC it was pouring rain; today the temperature has dropped back down into the 40's (with the wind chill it feels like the 30's), yet all I can think about right now is the future. It's funny because the more I mature, the more I realize that my priorities are shifting. The goals of becoming a member of some board or the SVP of This and That no longer matter nearly as much as they did just a couple of years ago. Life is polishing some of the rough edges on me. Now more than ever I just want a bright and happy future for myself and my loved ones.

Yesterday I had a tough conversation with Mr. Ex, which resulted in him saying "Well I guess it's a waste of time for us to go out again." FINALLY I had the guts to say what's been on my mind for a few weeks now.

I had no intention of bringing it up yesterday, but he mentioned to me again of his desire to write a book. I told him that he should get started on this goal right now by devoting at least one hour of his day to writing. If you don't know this about me, I'm a strong believer in setting a goal and then working towards that goal. So I asked him flat out how he felt about his goals and whether or not he's good at meeting his goals. Probably not the most direct way to ask the question I wanted the answer to, but I wanted to hear his response. He said that he's met some of his goals and that some he definitely hasn't met yet, but overall he feels ok with where he is in life to date. I told him honestly that the reason I ask him so many questions about his goals is because I find him to be a bit of an enigma to me. He talks a good game and says that he wants to settle down, yet if you look at his accomplishments to date on paper, it doesn't add up to very much.

One thing that has come up in previous conversations with Mr. Ex is his belief that the women he has dated in the past ALL had issues with him not having his college degree. I was honest with him and said that his having the degree is not the problem for me. The biggest issue for me is the fact that he is 36 years old, doesn't seem to have any career goals and seems to be in a holding pattern of some sort. I asked him to think about the issue from my perspective. How would he feel if he was the one who had it going on all levels (career, financials, physical and spiritual) and he was dating someone who seemed to be floundering (similar to his current situation)? His response this response to me was "Behind every man is a good woman." I agree that this statement is true, but asked him if he felt he should have his situation a little more stable before getting into a serious relationship. It was at this moment that the battery in his phone started to die and he told me he'd call me back.

When Mr. Ex called me back later that evening, he told me that he understood where I was coming from. Apparently he had been thinking about this too (although I think for him he really thought it was about whether he has a degree or not) and I had to ask him again if he felt he was ready to get into a serious relationship with anyone. He said that he is indeed ready and declared that things will fall into place for him. That he has the desire and that he's had a few setbacks in life, but he truly believes that he will be ok. He then shared that before he moved to NJ he had worked on a business plan for a couple of businesses (an Angolan restaurant and an import/export business). He said that he had a business plan that he worked on a few years ago, but that he's had a few setbacks over the years and has not worked on launching either in some time.

I got the sense that life for him got off track for Mr. Ex in 2003. That's the year he fixated on and that seems to be the last time he felt like he was doing well in regards to his work and financial life. He gave me a little of the back story about the situation, which involved living with a woman, a break-up and a car (always a recipe for disaster in my book). Needless to say he said for the first time in all of our talks that if things don't work out for him in NJ in a year he will probably move home. This is someone who just a week and a half ago on our last date said he never wants to move back home. Honestly, I think it is as a result of pressure from his family to move home because they see the same thing I see someone who is in his mid-30's floundering.

I am happy that I got this off my chest because I had been holding back because quite simply I wasn't sure how to tactfully bring it up. I don't think that this will always go down so smoothly, but in this instance it was a conversation that I learned more about myself than anything. Mr. Ex said that he still likes me and is interested in having another date with me (he actually wanted to go out tonight), but I have plans with some of my girls from work that I can't cancel. I'm still considering things, but to be honest I feel more comfortable with watching Mr. Ex and his situation to see how it develops. I hope that his claim that he will make it happen is true (for his sake).

Thanks again for reading my blog. I love hearing from you guys and this whole process is helping me to grow up (even more). Hope that you enjoy the rest of this week no matter what it brings your way. I'm realizing that being flexible is just as important as following the plan.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

After the talk...

Hello my faithful readers:

It's Tuesday and I can't wait for this weekend to come! I am busy studying for the GMAT and finishing up my final b-school application. Meanwhile my body is telling me I need to chill out. I woke up this morning with a burning stomach and a headache leftover from last night. The source of my headache is work related and I'll get a break from it starting tomorrow until the end of this week. So... today's blog might be more scattered than usual, because my brain is processing information at much slower rates today. :o)

Yesterday I promised to give a recap of my date with Mr. Ex last Friday. I know that many of you are wondering why I went out with him again, after our conversation on Thursday (the night prior to our Friday date). I have thought about it quite a bit and all I can say is that his treatment of me up until that phone conversation has been pretty respectable. He was attentive and most of all he's an intelligent man (I always feel like I learn something after our conversations). When we were setting up our date on Thursday night he said he just wanted to keep it open and not worry about planning what we going to do.

Friday comes and I didn't hear from Mr. Ex until almost 6 PM; in my head I'm thinking this date isn't going to happen. Mentally I'd already started planning my alternative night of catching up on my Netflix movies in my PJ's (and perhaps buying some Nilla Cakesters on the way home). The first thing he says on the phone is "I thought you didn't want to go out with me because I didn't hear from you." I was expecting him to make the call since he has been the initiator of all of our dates.

We finally met up at Port Authority (Mr. Ex takes a bus in from NJ) a little after 8:30 PM. He had stopped and bought me donuts from Dunkin because he remembered that I like sweets; a nice gesture thought I didn't end up eating any of them. I suggested we walk up to Hell's Kitchen (hood in NYC for all you non-New Yawkers) and maybe find a place to sit down and talk. Our walk uptown was a little awkward because he was pretty quiet. I think he was probably thinking about the stupid ish he said the night before. I was my usual bubbly self (I hate conflict) and usually if I don't want to deal with you I simply (passive aggressively) ignore your phone calls until you (give up and) stop calling.

We ended up stopping to have dinner at a restaurant I occasionally frequented when I worked in the 'hood. Rice n Beans is a Brazilian restaurant and Mr. Ex loved it there because the flavors were similar to the Portuguese food he grew up on in Angola. He shared a little bit of his knowledge about the food and gave me a little history of how Brazilians took some of the Angolan culture and claimed it as theirs. Did you know capoeira originated in Angola? I sure didn't, but now I do because of my time with Mr. Ex. He also spoke to our waiters in Portuguese and I think speaking in his native tongue made him more comfortable. Finally we started talking and he eventually said that he was "ok with waiting the 90 days for me, because he would like a relationship with me." He says he is serious about me, although he would 'do what he had to do in the meantime.'

Now this whole 'do what you gotta do' doesn't bother me while I'm not in a relationship with you; quite simply at this stage if I'm just dating you, then I have no claims on you. If we decide that we're together (doesn't mean married), then 'do what you gotta do' doesn't fly with me.

Cut to the next day...

On the Saturday after our date Mr. Ex mentioned that he wanted to take his profile down from pof.com where we met. Then he asked if I was planning to take my profile down. My non-commital response was I would take my profile down once I'm in a (committed) relationship. He didn't really have any response to that, nor did he offer to get into a relationship and I guess this means he still has to handle some business. He also asked me if I was able to have kids in this conversation. Baby on the brain much? I told him in no uncertain terms I have no interest in getting pregnant at this time (if ever).

Back to our date on Friday night...

The rest of our date was relatively uneventful, (besides him kissing me once) we walked around after dinner because of the warmer weather, then I dropped him off back at the Port Authority. We did have an awkward moment where he tried to give me a goodbye kiss and wanted me to wait until he did it. I ended up blowing him a kiss and hopping into the cab home instead of standing there for the passionate embrace he wanted. He did call me later on that night to make sure I made it home safely.

Here you have it, the date after 'The Talk' was fine. I had a nice time and Mr. Ex traeted me with respect. My biggest issue with him is the fact that he seems to be something that he referred to me as "an enigma." He's a grown man, who seems ready to settle down although his life seems to be in transition. Mr. Ex is an enigma to me (something he told me he thought I was on our date). On one hand: he doesn't have a career to speak of (he currently works a couple of part-time jobs), lives with two roommates (he's 36 years old), tells bad jokes and says he can't wait 90 days without 'doing what he has to do.' On the other hand: he treats me well, is attentive, intelligent, seems geniune and told me he wants a long term relationship with me. There is something else going on here, but I'm not sure what. Why is he so concerned about my fertility? I have a lot to consider, but you'll hear more about this once I decide whether to NEXT him.

Thanks again for reading today. Hope that the rest of your week is fantastic; I'm planning to hunker down for the rest of this week (after tonight) and study. Remember I love to hear from you so don't hesitate to comment or become a follower.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

Having "The Talk"

Hello my faithful readers:

Happy Monday to you all! This weekend went by way too quickly for me. I always come back to work every Monday thinking I could use one more day to just relax. Most of my time this weekend was divided between cleaning, grocery shopping and studying with a big emphasis on studying. I had a date on Friday night with Mr. Ex, which I'll recap in tomorrow's blog.

I recently read Steve Harvey's book, "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man," as most of you know. While I don't necessarily take everything Steve says in the book to heart, I agree with most of the advice he gives. One of the things Steve recommends is waiting at least 90 days before having sex with someone. Steve's book isn't the first place I've heard this advice. In the past I haven't always waited like I know I should, but it is now my current policy. All of you may not agree with this policy because it might work for you and because if I'm honest with myself, sometimes it's freakin HARD to wait. My hormones are constantly telling me "Girl you better do something about this drought situation RIGHT NOW!" (I hear crickets chirping right now so I must be the ONLY one with raging hormones).

Cut to last Thursday night during one of my phone conversations with Mr. Ex. Generally he asks intelligent, thought provoking questions and up to this point we'd been getting closer and closer to really discussing the 'sex issue' for a while. Finally he breaks out with a question that shook me a little "Have you ever been pregnant before?" I answered honestly with no and also added that I have no desire to get pregnant at this point in my life. We talked a little bit more and then I broke the news to him that I'm not planning to sleep with him for at least 90 days. His reaction to my bombshell was very eye-opening and surprising for me because up until this point he'd been very gentlemanly.

He basically said he didn't think waiting 90 days was possible and that he'd never heard of such a thing from a woman before. I just laughed and said that it was one of my requirements and that he could take it or leave it. Then he proceeded to say that he didn't know that he could wait for me and that I would have a hard time finding someone willing to wait 90 days. Then he tried to convince me that things have to happen naturally and you can't put deadlines on things. The kicker of the whole conversation for me was the fact that he said he felt like I should have put this bit of information up on my profile. That statement alone was HYSTERICAL to me (really put this on my dating profile). He also told me he felt that you run out of things to do on dates if you don't sleep with each other at some point within the 90 day window. I just laughed at all of his arguments for not waiting for 90 days, but inside I was thanking my lucky stars that this topic came up and I was hearing his real unedited reaction to the issue. My CPS was (and is still) in full effect now since our conversation (thanks Digi Jay for the terminology).

We had a few more back and forth exchanges and then decided to continue with our date plans for Friday night. In hindsight I have no idea why I agreed to go out with him again; after our conversation I figured it would be a waste of both of our time. I truly believe at this point he was planning to try to convince me of the error of my ways on Friday. In Mr. Ex's defense he said that having sex with me wasn't the only reason he was interested in me. Our conversation gave me lots to think about and made me realize that there is wisdom in waiting 90 days, because you can truly do more fact finding about the other person; like a trial period to figure out whether it's worth going further. I know that having a 90 day waiting period isn't the right choice for everyone, but for me at this stage in my life (and my emotional growth), it's the right choice for me.

I hope you have a great week - so far this one seems to be off to a good start for me. I'm feeling good and I believe we're in for some beautiful weather this week. Tomorrow I'll blog about our date on Friday after our Thursday night 'talk.'

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

The Anti-Seducer

Hello my faithful readers:

Today is Tuesday and I am in a fantastic mood. This week I'm focused on getting some things crossed of my personal to-do list, so I'm not going out nearly as much as I have been in the past couple of weeks. This is a good thing and I hope that as a result I'll be announcing some good news in the next couple of months. Now if only the weather would cooperate and WARM UP!
In yesterday's blog I gave you a recap of my date with Mr. Ex and today I want to provide you with a recap of my date on Saturday night with The E-card Stalker.

Now I'd initially set up my Saturday night date with The E-card Stalker on Monday last week. Prior to that we had talked on the phone maybe a couple of times since our first coffee date (almost a month and a half ago now). I didn't hear from him again until the Friday night before we were supposed to go out. As I was out on my date with Mr. Ex, I didn't get to speak with him on Friday. (FYI- The E-Card Stalker knew that I had plans for Friday night, because when we were setting the date up I told him I couldn't do Friday because I had other plans). I called him back on Saturday morning around 10:30 and he called me back around 1 pm. We decided to meet up at 7:3o that night.

I'd asked The E-card Stalker to plan this date because I was curious to see what he'd come up with and he wanted to meet up at BB King's in Times Square. Now personally I HATE the Times Square area and generally avoid it like the plague whenever I can; I assumed he was taking me to see a show at BB Kings so I was open to the idea of it until I arrived to have him say "They have a show downstairs, we have to go somewhere else." I should take a moment to describe what The E-card Stalker was wearing; he was dressed in exactly the same clothing from our first coffee date - black and white Nike baseball hat, black leather coat, black and white camouflage long sleeve thermal shirt, jeans and Nike running shoes.

I was nice about the change in plans and when we walked out and he guided me to the movie theater next door (same theater I'd been in the night before with Mr. Ex) I promptly made the suggestion to see "I Love You Man." I thought that the 8 o'clock show was sold out, but when we got in the cashier said that there were still seats in that show. Hallelujah! Finally I was going to see the movie I really wanted to see. Now as we were heading up all of the escalators he starts in again on how hard to reach I am and how the other men must be keeping me busy. I was personally annoyed because for someone who makes the absolute minimal effort to get in touch with me I thought he had a LOT OF NERVE trying to call me out on it. I just smiled nicely and said "I'm not all that hard to reach, our schedules just seem to be at odds." Guess he didn't believe my answer because then he kept going on about my other guys so I told him "Yes, I'm seeing other people."

We headed into the theater and grabbed our seats. Once the movie started up he tried to make a couple of lame jokes one of which was "Will I get a kiss tonight?" I tried not to roll my eyes and just shook my head NO. Early on in the movie he tried to grab my hand and I just pulled my hand away. Something about him and his lame jokes and trying to grab on me 10 minutes in didn't sit right with me. He assumed that he could go there with me and assumed we have more of a relationship than we have, when I kept telling him we need to get to know each other. You barely know me. Quite simply my advice to any man with game "EASE INTO IT PLAYER!"

After the movie (which we both LOVED - it's hysterical), we ended up going to Chevy's right next to the movie theater. The one thing that was GLARING to me, that I didn't bother to call him on is the fact that he didn't remove his baseball hat when we sat down at dinner. This man is 40+ years old and he didn't have the good sense to remove his baseball hat? I think from that moment on I was done with our date.

It's here where we had a little more in depth conversation. Here is where I mentioned again that I felt like he didn't know me well enough to keep saying that he was fond of me and wanted a relationship with me. He brought up my busy schedule again and this is where I told him that my number one priority right now is studying and getting into grad school so although I might be going out socially, I also spend a good deal of my time in classes and studying. When I mentioned my future plans to go to grad school (in Europe) he seemed surprised (although I know I had mentioned to all of my dates that I'm taking a french class and that I'm studying for the GMAT) his response was "I thought the french class was just for fun. I didn't think you would be into moving over there. Guess you'll have to just hop on a plane every month for a visit." WTF?

Personally I felt that The E-card Stalker and I had a lot more chemistry on our first coffee date. I told him straight up and also mentioned how important chemistry was for me in a relationship. I believe you either have chemistry or you don't and he felt you can grow into chemistry with a person. I believe pursuing any sort of relationship without chemistry is a waste of time (and I definitely don't believe you should wait around for it to grow). Some of you may disagree with me here, but that's what I believe. For me chemistry is a connection on any of these three areas: physical, mental and spiritual. If you're connected on all 3 levels I think your relationship has a fair shot at succeeding.

By the end of the night it was clear for me that I had no interest in seeing The E-card Stalker again. When he dropped me off at the entrance to my train he made a last ditch effort to say he wanted to see me again. Have I heard from him since our date? That would be a BIG FAT NO! Maybe he took his cues from me and felt that I just wasn't that in to him so it wasn't worth the effort. The fact that he never made the effort from the beginning up until our 2nd date to truly get to know me in any way and I feel that all of the following are just signs of that.

• He never really called me, nor ever tried to switch up the times he called to try to reach me
• His plans for the date were half-assed
• He didn't make the effort in the way he dressed (nor did he have the good sense to take his baseball hat off at dinner)
• He had no interest in getting to know me or my plans

Having the dates with Mr. Ex and The E-card Stalker back to back was an interesting experience for me. It gave me the opportunity to compare both experiences and think about how I like to be treated in a relationship and in the end I really want someone that is trying just a little bit harder. The E-card Stalker exhibited some typical Anti-Seducer behavior (from what I've read in "The Art of Seduction") and it was a big turn-off to me especially in comparison to my date the night before. I watched Steve Harvey on "Oprah" yesterday with his audience of women and he said something along the lines of "Chivalry isn't dead, women have just stopped requiring it in their relationships." Well now that I've had a recent taste of what chivalry is like, I will require it in all my relationships from now on. Anything else is just a waste of my time and you know what, I'm ok with waiting for the right thing for me.

Hope that you enjoyed reading the blog today. If you like what you're reading here - feel free to become a follower or comment (on the blog) you can even do it anonymously. I promise I won't bite you! Have a great day today.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

Introspection and investigation

Hello my faithful readers:

I hope that you're having a wonderful day - I certainly am. This morning I was running late and caught a cab to the express train stop and the cab driver didn't have change so he gave me the ride for free. This was so nice and totally unexpected that I hope he receives his blessing to me back in spades. As I was ran from his cab and into the Nostrand Ave. A/C subway station I was able to hop on the train. Even more importantly I completed one of my grad school applications and I have one more to do. That's a big sense of accomplishment for me and now I have to buckle down to complete my last one.

Yesterday one of my friends, Little Miss, read my blog "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" and pointed out something I had never considered. She mentioned that all of my descriptions within the blog were all physical descriptions - nothing about personality. I am carefully thinking about this now, because it's actually something that frustrates me when I am getting to know someone. The fact that they don't want to know about me, my interests or my personality frustrates me. On the other hand if you're getting to know a person in a short social situation (e.g. at a party or out at a bar) it's tough to get beyond merely superficial conversation along the lines of "what's your name, what do you do and are you single?"

Have I been objectifying men as merely physical objects all of this time? I would probably need at least a year of therapy to get to the root of any issues I have on this subject, but Little Miss gave me a homework assignment that I'll be working on over the next few weeks. We attract what we value even if it is disguised as something we do not value according to Little Miss. I happen to agree with this statement wholeheartedly. To help me understand some of my behavior and how I am viewing men she suggested I seriously consider doing the following:

1) Take an inventory of all my relationships (past and present) to determine what brought us together

2) Determine what attracted me to each relationship? Determine what need was met by the relationship?

3) Once involved determine why the relationship didn't work? What was it lacking?

I believe going through this process will help me to identify my issues (if any) so that I'm not constantly repeating the same mistakes (which are merely symptoms of the underlying problems). This will take some time if I do it the right way; at the other end I hope that I'll understand myself a lot better.

I encourage you all to do the same if you're find yourself repeating the same mistakes in your relationships. Thanks again for all the support and comments you give me. I learn something from each of you - even if it is a tough lesson. I appreciate all of the feedback you give me.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

Girls just wanna have fun

Hello my faithful readers:



It's Monday and after having such great weather in NYC this weekend I'm wondering where it all went! I hope that you all had a fantastic weekend and took the time out to enjoy yourselves and the great weather (at least a little bit). Enough of my kvetching about the bad weather I'm proclaiming that this week is going to be fantastic! I feel it in my bones...

This weekend was action packed and I started things off with a bang (sort of) by having a catch-up dinner with a friend of mine (Little Miss) who I haven't seen in forever. She has a new guy in her life that sounds like someone who would be a good man and compliment for her personality. After dinner we headed over to The Slipper Room where we had a nice time checking out a little bit of the Burlesque show that night. Little Miss is currently taking Burlesque classes and I'm considering taking this class when I get some extra dough. I think some burlesque acts are VERY sexy and I believe there can ever be too much sexy in my life.

Saturday night I had a great time hanging out with The Roodster and Lil B at Target's 1st Saturday party at the Brooklyn Museum. The place was packed and diverse and although I wasn't necessarily prepared for a night full of electronica/house music, I still managed to have a good time just watching the eye candy walk by and talking to people. I think all of Brooklyn was out and about that night and I met a couple of people (one very friendly guy fresh off the boat from Croatia) and a couple of handsome men who are friends of my friend DigiJay. Digi Jay was there too and I harassed him to introduce me to his people - DJ you never did, but it's all good because I got to meet them later when we bumped into them later on with The Roodster. I was hoping to see them later on at one of the many after parties in the local hood, but they ended up going home and only one of them came back out later that night.

We ended up heading over to Soda Bar which was a no-frills bar, lounge not far from the museum and in their hip-hop room they had one of the best DJ's I've heard in a while (can't recall his name right now). He was playing all of the hip-hop/R&B hits from the mid-late 90's and early 2000's and boy did I shake my groove thang all night long! The room was full of eye candy and all of Brooklyn's finest. I decided to let loose and get my drink on... and on. I got a little tipsy and very friendly with my new friend Mr. Smell Good. I kept tapping him to get his attention and then turning away ( like I was in the 2nd grade I know) and then finally I asked him if he was hot in his coat. I told him he made me hot just seeing him in it and then he finally took it off and we talked for a bit and asked what scent he was wearing and he told me. From then it was ON.

Mr. Smell Good falls into the category of my big weakness when it comes to men. He was cute and he was 6'5. This is my type I guess you could say just because I ALWAYS feel like a woman when I'm with a man this tall. We talked for a bit and I found out that he's 34, lives in Bedstuy not far from where I love, works in the mental health field and he is in a "complicated relationship." Now normally even continuing a conversation with somebody that's in any type of relationship is a BIG no-no for me and I told him that I believe in karma and didn't want to be disrespectful to his relationship no matter what the status is... by the way I HATE that facebook has given validity to the whole complicated relationship status; I think it's BS (either you're together or you're not)!

We continued to get to know each other and I have to say that we had a strong physical attraction if nothing else. Mr. Smell Good and I were all over each other like white on rice and we got into a groove which for me is always a good thing. I'm making this PG, but I'll say that we would be good together doing the horizontal mambo (if our short time together was any sign). I'm not sure I will give him a call even though he gave me his number before he left. His situation sounds way too messy for me to get into right now and although he told me that "It was already too late for his situation before he met me" I don't even want to deal with finding out. I just hope I haven't completely messed my karma too badly by knowingly involving myself in whatever his situation is (no matter how small my part was); I never like to think of myself as trifling and if I heard this story in the context of this being my man all hugged up on some strange chic in the club, I would call the other girl (me) trifling as well as my man and probably leave his a$$.

If I decide that what I want is a "friends with benefits situation" I think Mr. Smell Good is at the top of my list. I was no angel in this situation and I realize that I should probably do some re-evaluating what I want and why I keep ending up in situations that are headed right for "friends with benefits" zone. I had fun this weekend, I blew off some steam with my friends, met some new people and maybe ended the drought I feared so much last week. I realize I still need to firm up in my mind what I want out of my dating experiences, but I also know that it's about having fun throughout this process.

I hope that you all have a fantastic week - I can't wait for what this week has in store for me. I have the feeling that something very good is about to come my way.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

Dating drought

Hello my faithful readers:

It's been a while since I last regaled you with my dating tales and for that I apologize, but it's simply because I haven't had anything that I felt would be of interest to report this week. Things are slow and I seem to be in the middle of a dating drought. Ok that might be a little dramatic since it's really only been a week, but honestly I'm a little uninspired by my present dating options.

I have recently started corresponding with a couple of gentleman from the online dating website http://www.plentyoffish.com/. The site is one of the few free dating websites out there and I have to say that from my perspective as a marketing professional it is a little unappealing because of the cluttered look and feel of the user interface (UI for all you web pro's out there). Now the guys I've met seem like nice people, but none of them have me enthused enough to go out on a date with them.

One of the guys who I will now affectionately refer to as Mr. Ex is a nice guy. Mr. Ex is 36, is from Angola and works in sales in New Jersey (30 miles past Newark). He seems to LOVE talking to me about all of his ex girlfriends. Since I'm such a patient listener, I suppose he thinks I'm the best place to get it all off his chest, but to be honest and like most people, I have no real interest in him remininscing about all of the women he's had in his life. Perhaps it's a cultural thing, but that's all he seems to go on about and the other day I cut our conversation short after about ten minutes and told him I needed to go get ready for bed. He called me last night and I couldn't make myself return the call because I simply didn't have the energy to listen to another story.

One of the other men, The Music Teacher, is also 36 (hey that might be my magic number) who doesn't have a profile pic up and his profile says he's just there to "Hang Out." He keeps e-mailing me to go out on a date with him, but my red flags are raised by anyone who doesn't know how to put a pic up on their profile. Not that looks are the end all be all for me, but I think it's a little unfair that he can see me, but I can't see him. He seems nice enough, but again nothing about him, his responses to my questions makes me all that inclined to meet up with him. When I asked him what about my profile attracted him to me he said "I just think you're beautiful." That's a nice sentiment, but I don't even think he read my profile to see if we have anything in common.

I know, I know, I know... some of you think I'm just being nitpicky and YES perhaps I am. But I'm ok waiting for quality at this stage in my life. As I meet more and more people I'm realizing that what is most important for me isn't quantity, but the quality of the man. I'm sure some of these men will make nice friends for me in the future, but for now I think I can keep it moving.

This weekend I'm planning to hit up a few parties, there's a networking "Family Day" event for TJ Martell on Saturday and a friend of mine is having a birthday hang tomorrow night, plus The Brooklyn Museum is having its First Saturday party tomorrow night as well. I'll try to hit up at least one of these things and get my booty out of my apartment so that I can meet other people. Although I was a little weary when I started this week and even whined to one of my co-workers that "This is haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaard," I'm feeling much better as I head into this weekend. My priorities are straight, I feel much better health wise and I'm really loving me and all I have to offer right now.

I hope that you guys have a great weekend! Thanks for the support and if you want to be my Platonic Activity Partner (or my wing man or wing woman) this weekend hit me up. I'd love to have some company. I'm hoping this weekend will get me out of this dating drought I seem to be stuck in.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

A nice surprise

Hello my faithful readers:

This weekend was chock full of surprise and adventure. Overall the weekend was great and the highlight was hanging out with my girls (Brookey, EJ and Momo) at the Ne-yo, Musiq and Jazmine Sullivan concert last night at Radio City. I was especially surprised by how fantastic Ne-yo is live - he made me want to go back and get some of his older CD's he was that good. I also had a couple of dates this weekend and let's just say both of them ended up being the total opposite of what I was expecting from them.

On Friday night I had a coffee date with The E-Card Stalker and was pleasantly surprised by how well we connected. I have to admit that I was totally NOT into going on this date as many of my co-workers can attest and almost considered backing out last minute. To get myself in the mood I went to get a manicure-pedicure at the local nail spot and ended up running almost 20 minutes late as a result. I know - this is definitely one of the things that if I were on the other side I would have been ticked off by, but in my defense I texted him 20 minutes prior to our meeting time to let him know that I was running late. He didn't get the text (apparently he is one of the few who doesn't check their phone after getting off the train), but things ended up working out and I got there about 20 minutes after our scheduled meeting time.

My first impression of The E-card Stalker was that he looked a HECK of a lot older than what his profile said he was. His face looked older than my father's face and I will admit now that my Dad has a babyface, but I remember thinking "how old is this guy really?" He was dressed casually in black jeans and a white t-shirt with a NY Yankees baseball hat and some sneakers. He's an attractive guy except for the fact that he looked way older than me. I felt like anyone looking at us would think I was meeting my pops for coffee.

I am sure I was still giving off an uninterested vibe at this point, but I did have the good sense to be apologetic about running so late. I cracked a few jokes about him not checking the phone and we were all good. The thing I liked most of about The E-card Stalker was our conversation. We connected on a number of topics and we debated on and off about relationships and the thing I remember most is his saying that "Women hold all of the power in relationships." I agree with this statement to a certain extent - we do hold power in our relationships, it's just a matter of being confident enough to assert our power in the right way. He also seemed to be pretty perceptive without me saying much correctly identified me as picky and more mature than my age might indicate. We both agreed that our biggest issue with online dating is that most people don't take the time to actually read the profiles before they make contact with the potential dates.

I learned a little bit more about him the more we talked and I found out he's African (has an accent and all), he went to college and worked in Canada for a few years before moving to Rochester to work at Kodak for 9 years before moving 3 years ago to NYC. He's working as a chemical engineer and says that this involves a lot of testing and I get the sense that he spends the majority of his time working. He's also a huge fan of sports especially football and basketball; he played football when he was younger.

We spent two and a half hours at Starbucks (we probably should have moved on to another location) and at by the end of the night he was sweet and walked me over to the entrance to my train and watched to make sure I got on the train safely, wise cracking that he wanted to make sure I got on safe because he was the last person to see me! Overall I appreciated his sense of humor and intelligence; I'd be willing to have a second date with him. He called me on Saturday evening and left me a nice message. I left him a nice return voicemail message on Sunday and haven't heard back from him yet. Hopefully we'll get the opportunity to go out on a 2nd date to continue getting to know each other better. The E-card Stalker was a nice surprise and a great way to kick-start my weekend. Although I'm not sure how physically attracted I am to him at this point - I think we could be friends at the very least.

Tomorrow I'll give you a little recap of my 2nd date with Mystervee. This date was also a bit of a surprise, but more on that tomorrow. I have a good feeling about this week so far I'm learning a lot about me and what I want with this whole project. I really appreciate everyone for giving me tips, advice and sharing their personal stories with me. You are all truly an inspiration to me. Here's to a great week!

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

PS - I told him during the date that his e-cards were a little off putting to me, he was puzzled by it, but I think that I was able to make him understand why it might be weird to get them with such sappy language from a total stranger. I think after having met him that it might just be a cultural/age issue more than him being a total weirdo.

It's Friday and I have a date! (I think)

Hello my faithful readers:

Happy Friday to you! As usual I'm very happy to see this weekend come. This week in general has been quite busy for me at work and I feel a sense of accomplishment for the first time in weeks. My weekend is shaping up to be busier than I planned. I have a date tonight, a date tomorrow and on Sunday I'll be celebrating Brookey's birthday with the girls at the
Ne-yo/Musiq / Jazmine Sullivan concert at Radio City Music Hall. I am super excited about life right now and I keep pinching myself, because while the world seems to be crumbling around us all, things for me personally are moving in the right direction.

Yesterday I finally heard from Mystervee after his trip to London. He texted me (apparently our little conversation about my preference for phone calls didn't register at all) asking me how my day was going. I texted him back telling him I was headed to French class and said I'd call him later. I did call him back (HUGE ACCOMPLISHMENT FOR ME) when I got home after class and we had a nice conversation. I learned a little bit more about him and if I'm completely honest with you guys, I like him a little bit more after our chat last night. He continues to surprise me, but the one thing I get from him is that he seems to be an adventure junkie. This is my own little mini-profile of him based on the little I know about him; he's taken flying lessons before he rides a motorcycle and is into action sports.

I've heard him mention to me twice now in separate conversations that he wants someone spontaneous. I asked him to explain what he meant by that yesterday and he said "I want someone who doesn't take forever to get ready and he doesn't want to hear about her problems with her hair." Now for me this doesn't necessarily mean a person is spontaneous. However, I get the feeling that he's a last minute plans kind of guy. Last minute planning goes totally against my nature although I love being spontaneous as much as the next person. Personally I need to have a general outline of my plans and activities so that I can fit in all of the things I have to get done on a daily basis.

This morning I received a lovely early morning (8:30 AM) text from him saying "Sorry for babbling so much last night but I would like 2 c u," My response text was "I want to c u too, how about Saturday? U weren't babbling." I have mentioned before on this blog that I like to have my dates planned ahead - even if I didn't have another date tonight, I probably would have insisted on doing something on my next available free night. We're meeting up tomorrow for our second date. We have not confirmed what we're doing, but I want him to come up with something this time. I'll admit that pushing the date to my preferred day was a small win for me and my ego. I hope that if we decide to date each other more we can find a compromise for scheduling our time together that makes both of us happy.

Tonight I'm supposed to have a coffee date with The E-card Stalker and I am working to keep a positive attitude about it. He called me last night and left me a voicemail message (when I was in transit from French class) asking me to call him back to confirm our plans. I called him back, but never heard from him. If I don't hear from him today I'm going home after work. I'll let you know on Monday what happens with him.

Thanks again for all the love and support for the blog. I love hearing from you all and sharing your experiences with me. I hope that you have a wonderful weekend. Keep warm this weekend if you're up here in NYC - it's supposed to be cold!

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

The E-card Stalker re-visited

Hello my faithful readers:

I hope that you all had a wonderful long weekend, I spent the weekend re-charging my battery after running myself a little ragged over the past few weeks. On Friday night my friend AG and I had dinner together. She inspired me with the story of how she and her fiance met and eventually got together and as I've heard from most of my friends the right one usually comes along when you're not really looking. My friend The Roodster's birthday celebration was also Friday night and I spent the night with our mutual friend PB, learning how to identify a Six Figure Man. PB is a self proclaimed expert and is currently hunting for a rich woman to marry him. After such an event filled week I decided taking a break was best for me and my health.

Now most of you who know me are aware that I celebrate Singles Awareness Day. I only sent one e-card that day and it was in response to another sappy e-card from 'The E-card Stalker."
Here's a link to the card I sent just because I couldn't take it anymore!:

http://www.someecards.com/upload/valentine_s_day/i_wanted_to_wish_you_a.html

Too mean? You decide although I thought it was pretty funny myself. He called me last night in response to my e-mail to him last week. I hadn't heard anything from him other than the lame e-card on V-day. Our conversation was sort of stilted just because when he called I didn't recognize the number and I said hello. We had an awkward couple of "Hello" exchanges until I finally impatiently said "Who is this?" He responded it's "The E-card Stalker" from Yahoo Personals. He proceeded to ask if I'd received his e-card and I said "Oh yea, I got your e-card and I sent one back to you."

I won't get into the rest of our awkward conversation, but we tentatively set up to have a quick coffee date on Friday. I'm trying to keep an open mind, but this guy rubbed me the wrong way on the phone. I know that some of this is all manufactured in my mind, but one of the main issues I have with him is that he sent me sappy e-cards before meeting me in person. It's just too weird for me. Hope you have a great week!

The e-card stalker

Hello my faithful readers:

It's Thursday and I'm looking forward to the long weekend! This week has been sort of low key for me, but tonight I am planning to head out with a couple of friends of mine for a Raphael Saddiq event at Soho House tonight. I'm more interested in checking out the venue, but it will be good to see some of his performance from a new show "Live From The Artists Den" airing on a PBS affiliate near you. Before the screening tonight I have french class, so I hope I can maintain enough energy to get through the night.

Most of my co-workers have heard me rant and rant about a gentleman I like to call the "E-card Stalker." On Monday I got a message on Yahoo Personals the other day.

Here's his note for your reading pleasure:

HELLO MISS "COLGATE SMILE',
WHY DO YOU KEEP SMILING AND WINKING AT ME
FROM YOUR PICTURES WHEN YOU WILL NOT EVEN
WRITE TO SAY HELLO TO A BROTHA ? LOL .
SEASON'S GREETINGS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR.
WRITE SOON AND STAY SWEET.

In response to this note I re-sent him an e-mail that he hadn't responded to a few months ago in his yahoo e-mail account. During this period of no communication between us, I received e-cards for Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. This is where the "E-card Stalker" was born. I never responded to any of his e-cards because I thought it was downright weird of him to send e-cards, when he wasn't responding to my regular e-mail to him.

He responded to my forwarded note and said that my e-mail had gone into his junk mail by mistake. He inquired about my initial offer of setting up a coffee date, but I am so turned off by his e-cards to me that I'm not sure I can do it. All of his notes to me were super sappy and in my opinion inappropriate to send to someone you don't know very well. I don't do well with sappy men, in fact I'm a huge fan of people with snarky senses of humor; send me an e-card from someecards and I'm yours forever.

I'll keep you posted on whether or not I actually make it out on a coffee date with the "E-card Stalker." Although I want to keep an open mind about him, his weird e-cards have completely turned me off. How much do you want to bet I get a sappy Valentine's Day e-card from him? Have a wonderful day and I'll try to give you an update tomorrow about tonight.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

I hate texting

Hello Faithful Readers:

Hope that you're all enjoying this fine Tuesday morning. I have to say that you guys are some of the most supportive people I've ever met. Thanks for all of the advice and support you have given me along the way and here's where I encourage you all to keep it coming, because I LOVE hearing from you.

Last night I went out with one of my co-workers, Ms. Vega, to a lovely networking event for a group called Supernodes at a very sexy wine bar called CLO in the Time Warner Center. It was a futuristic experience and eventually I'd like to go back under less crowded circumstances. I felt like I was at my high school reunion because I saw a bunch of my old co-workers from IDJ and it was great seeing that everyone is doing so well now.

One of the people I met, a great guy named T, and I ended up getting into a discussion about women and their relationships with men. I'm not sure how we even got on the subject so quickly, but he said that women need to tell men what it is they want, simply because men aren't mind-readers and all women are different. One thing he said really resonated with me "Women always have it easier because with men if you get the general [owners] manual for a man, you basically have an understanding of how to deal with most men. With women each one requires a different 300 page [owners] manual. I'd never really thought of myself or any of my female friends in these terms and it made me realize that perhaps he's on to something. I know that I'm definitely like any of my friends when it comes to dating and relationships.

T also brought up something last night that I had been complaining about for a while now. He said that texting has made dating life much easier for men. Men can send a mass text messages to all of their girls and it makes us ladies feel our guy is actually thinking about us. Texting also offers the guys the opportunity to get assistance from their boys on what to say in the text. Plus texting allows us all to take our time in responding versus a phone or in person conversation.

His comments caused me to think about my own current situation. Last Friday the day after our first coffee date Mystervee texted me to say he enjoyed the meeting. Then he continued to hold a full text conversation until after a few exchanges it ended. I complained to my friend Digi Jay and he gave me a piece of advice that blew my mind. Quite simply he said to text MV with the following message: CALL ME. This advice was mind boggling for me, because as outspoken as I normally am, I'd never even considered saying something about my issues with texting. Now I probably should explain that my biggest issue with texting is more about having a full on conversation via text. I don't mind if you use it to pass along quick information or confirm a meeting time or something along those lines, but if your text requires a several text message back and forth exchange; personally I'd prefer it if you just picked up the phone to call me. So I suffered through lots of texting during the weekend and finally when we were talking [on the phone] last night I finally told him that I hated texting and preferred to have conversations on the phone if we couldn't see each other.

You know what? I actually felt much better after I got that off my chest. Now we'll see what happens with MV after my comment, I'm hoping he was listening and not just hearing what I said. I have a feeling that we'll be good friends at the end of our experience if nothing else, but I won't be nearly as afraid to say what I mean with any of the guys I date. Now I just have to break all of my new friends of their texting habits. Yep the Youngun is also a big text abuser!

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

I'm a geek (in disguise)

Hello my faithful readers:

It's Monday morning and I'm in a great mood today. The weather is warmer, my weekend was great and quite simply I'm sick and tired of feeling like I have a storm cloud hanging over my head. This week is going to be fantastic and it all started with my weekend at Comic Con NYC.

Comic Con NYC is a 3 day festival at Jacob Javitts Center here in NYC. I bought the weekend pass for $50; overall I felt like the pass was well worth the money although I only attended the Saturday and Sunday sessions. The fest is massive and there is a main floor where you walk in and you're assaulted by the crowds, noise and lots and lots of costumed people walking around. Even on my walk over from the subway I saw people in full costume and boy do they take it seriously. There are all sorts of people at this convention every combination of man, woman, child you'd ever want to see was in attendance. For me that was quite exciting because my plan was to meet lots of new people here.

My first tip for those hoping to meet new people at Comic Con is to be open-minded. There's a lot to see and loads of new and exciting activities to try out if you're open-minded. The great thing about Comic Con that was appealing to me is that it's not just about the comic books. Comic books are a huge part of the fest, but if you're a fan of TV, film or video games then there's something there for you as well. I attended a few of the TV show panels (Chuck and Joss Whedon's panel on his new show Dollhouse) and had a great time in them. The main floor was a lot of fun too and I even ran into some of my favorite tv/movie characters from childhood by walking around and exploring.

The second thing I'd recommend is to try wearing a costume or as I did a colorful wig. Getting noticed at Comic Con is nearly impossible without flying your freak flag at least a little bit. I noticed that more folks were willing to talk to me when I had the wig on than without it. What's ironic about this advice is that although there are lots of people in costumes at Comic Con, there were a lot more people not wearing them.

My last bit of advice is to talk to people. Sounds simplistic, but it's something that I didn't do quite as much of just because I was simply in awe of all the visual stimulation. It was also intimidating because I'm not such a super fan that I knew every single comic book character or type of anime. I heard lots of in depth conversations about the development of character and story by many of the fans and to be honest I was intimidated because what they were talking about sounded like Greek to me as a casual observer. I think if I had asked a few questions most people would have been glad to explain the intricacies of their favorite comic books and characters.

Now going into this experience a lot of my friends (some of you my dear readers!) warned me that I would absolutely hate going to Comic Con. Guess what? I'm a HUGE pop culture geek and being at Comic Con was amazing for me. It felt like I was hanging out with some of my favorite childhood friends once again. Comic Con is the place where you're free to let your imagination run wild and your inner child have some fun. This is something I think a lot of people could use right now, given how grim our future seems with wars and economic meltdowns hanging over our heads.

Did I make a love connection at Comic Con? No, but there were an awful lot of cuties walking around throughout the weekend. It's definitely not as bad as most of us imagined and I had a great time hanging out there. I think I found a new way to spend my time this weekend and next year I want to go back! I also have to say a special thank you to my friend A and G for hanging out with me on Sunday! I had a lot of fun when they both joined and geeked out a little with me!


Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

Online dating (maybe not a nightmare)

Hello Readers:

TGIF! I have to say that although I've had a wonderful time this week my battery is running a little low and I need to take tonight off and get some much needed rest. I hope that you all go out and have a ball for me, because I'm planning to sit at home in my PJ's catching up on all the TV shows on my DVR and netflix.

Now I know that most of you are waiting to find out more about how last night went with Mystervee (MV). As I mentioned in yesterday's blog we met up for a quick coffee date. I arrived before he did and waited for a few minutes before ordering my drink (we agreed to go dutch prior to meeting up). After I got my drink I headed upstairs to the lounge area to grab a table. MV came in about ten minutes late and because I was upstairs he said he stood there for a while before texting me. Meanwhile I had texted him to order his drink and meet me in the upstairs lounge area. Ironically neither of us is a coffee drinker (but we ordered variations of the same tea). I mentally docked him a few points for him showing up so late(of course)!

The first thing I thought when MV came up was Thank God he does look like his pictures plus he really is 6'3 (SCORE). He was dressed casually in a button down shirt (navy), blue jeans and some timbs. We greeted each other with a nice hug and he took off all his winter gear and sat down to chat. He's got a great smile and I was happy that his looks were equally matched by his intelligence.

Overall the conversation was good last night. I slipped into Oprah Winfrey mode and asked most of the questions that popped into my head about him. I did edit some of the crazy stuff out :o) maybe we'll get to it in the future. MV seems to be a nice guy and I found out that his birthday is exactly 7 days before mine one of the first of many things we have in common. He loves to travel, is into indie films (he's a regular at the Angelika theater and has a subscription to Netflix), seems to be a family man and has a crazy tea obsession. Although he's between projects right now, MV is an electrical engineer. From our conversation last night, it sounds as if he's used to the breaks between projects and uses the time to travel abroad and buy real estate. I'll have to do more research about his work situation if we decide to have another date. The biggest surprise for me about him was the fact that he is divorced; obviously I didn't notice it on his profile prior to our date. I respected the fact that he had nothing negative to say about his experience, it just didn't work out for him and his ex-wife.

I had to hustle out after about an hour to get to french class on time and was sad I had to leave. We walked to the train together and he hopped on the Path back to his condo in Jersey City and me to my french class at the 92nd Street Y. Our parting hug was nice and overall I felt like I'd met someone a lot like me (my male clone perhaps?), which for me isn't a bad thing. MV was physically attractive, confident and down to earth. Plus we like a lot of the same things and hang out in some of the same hoods. I hope that we'll mutually decide to hang out again as I can see the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

This weekend I'm planning to hit up Comic Con NYC (insert jokes here). It should be a fun time and a few of my friends are planning to come through. I'm confirmed to meet one of my co-workers A and we'll hit up a few panels from our favorite shows. Hope that you all have a wonderful weekend and as always thanks for reading!

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

PS - Neither of us said we'd call each other at the end of our night, nor have I heard from him yet. So I'm not getting my hopes up!

Too picky?

Hello to all of you my faithful readers:

I could use an injection of energy today after my whirlwind tour of a couple of networking events last night. I consider last night a success as I met quite a few people that could help me out on both the business and personal levels. It was also great getting to hang out with one of my co-workers J-Dub and our mutual friend EB! J-Dub is a lot of fun and who knew she could shake her groove thang with the best of us!

I'll talk about one guy in particular that struck my fancy last night at the VMix/Buzz networking event (although I met a few). We'll call him N.O. Lawyer because I found out in conversation that he works as a financial lawyer (still have no idea what he really does), hasn't watched a music video in years (WHAT? for those of you that know me well it's pretty much a staple for me) and he's into sports. He seems nice enough and we had a bit of witty banter in our 15 minute conversation. I'm realizing that on all most of my initial conversations with men I never got to the most important information like is he single? So if we have a follow-up conversation I plan to get to the bottom of that mystery immediately. I liked his personality so much that I think he'd make a good friend for me; he was just such a chill and laughed at some of my jokes.

Now on to the real reason for this blog. Now I mentioned in yesterday's blog that I've been corresponding with a few people online at Blacksingles.com. Well in the spirit of being open minded I have relaxed my rigid standards just a bit, but I have to draw the line somewhere and I think my line stops right at - Poorgrammarspellingville. I also draw the line at people who seem to have stalker tendancies before I even meet them. So for your reading pleasure here are a few excerpts from a couple of my potential suitors:

Meet Mystervee (posted as sent):

Right now I'm taking class to keep busy while i have sometime off from work. My last project i worked on was Citifield the new Shea stadium.
My job is pretty cool considering all good things come to a end but it 's the camaraderie's of meeting new pple and no matter what it's always a better project on the horizon!

In my time i usually purchase property for a fast buck! I'm good with my hand's so it really come natural. I went to a auction on sat to see the average home now sells for 50K wow!

So when I'm not doing either I'm on my motorcycle or travel ling with a good book. I'm headed to London next week to catch with some friend's.

Meet dadoo14 (stalker who also has bad spelling and grammer errors):

Hie my new friend,
i made two attempted to see if you were on, but unfortunately you weren't. I hope you have a good time in those events, please make sure you don't have too much, because you were the only one i expected to have some fun with. You know i truely want to be in contact with you. I miss you so very much, i can not wait to be just there for you and you for me. Good night, sleep well and if somehow you have a chance to come online, leave me a message.

Now I pose this question to all of you my dear readers-- am I being too picky? I really think the first online guy Mystervee is attractive physically and he seems interesting (albeit unemployed). Can I forgive his lack of spell check and poor sentence structure and just make sure we never write to each other again? The stalker guy makes me nervous and I sent him a note saying he was making me uncomfortable because we didn't know each other well enough to miss each other. What do you think? I'm looking forward to seeing some of your comments on this one!

Weekend Update

Hello my faithful readers:


Hope you had a great weekend - I certainly had a ball. Although I didn't have any dates this weekend it certainly wasn't because I didn't put myself out there. I went out every single day this weekend, which for me is a BIG DEAL. I never go out every single day of the weekend normally, but this is a New Year and I'm working to maintain my new improved positive attitude. I also accomplished the amazing task of signing up and PAYING (yes I said it PAYING)for a new dating service. I'll talk more about on online dating services later.


Friday night I jump started my weekend by hanging out with JF at Caroline's for the Michael Ian Black (MIB) comedy show. MIB was funny and the host that night was particularly funny, even though some of the opening comics were disappointingly bad. It was my first time visiting Caroline's. I have to say that if you want to meet new people, Caroline's probably is not the best environment for cruising for dates, unless you hang out at the bar the whole time.


Bowling at Leisure Time in Port Authority was on the agenda for Saturday to celebrate my friend MK's birthday. Although I am not the best bowler in the world I had a great time and managed to hit a few pins before the end of the evening. I saw a few attractive men here, but it was hard to try chatting them up because they were at lanes way down at the other end of the alley. Bowling is only good for dating if you're doing it as a fun dating activity. It's hard to cruise for people at the bowling alley unless you hang out at the bar. We went out for drinks at a local bar afterwards (Bullmoose Lounge) where it was pretty quiet because we were there at 6:30 PM; probably a little early to have much of a social scene going on. I went home after our drinks for a quiet evening relaxing and watching a little tv.

Sunday was a busy day and I started my day by going out to brunch at Cowgirl for my newly engaged friend A's birthday. It was fun and I got to hang out with a few folks that I hadn't seen for a while - and for me always a good time for me. In conversation I mentioned my plan to go to Comic Con NYC this weekend and I think I might have someone who is interested in coming with me so that I don't have to brave it all by myself. I'll write more about Comic Con NYC later this week. After brunch with the lovely ladies at A's party I met up with one of my best friends GG; she's visiting from Houston and is pregnant with twins.

After hanging with GG I went home and one of my friends OJ gave me a call. He was reading the "Vows" section in the NY Times and saw an article about a couple that married after a whirlwind courtship. He said that the woman in the article reminded me of him and after reading it I can wholeheartedly say that we probably have many things in common (although I have never used my oven as storage space). Here's a link in case you missed it: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/01/fashion/weddings/01VOWS.html?_r=1

So after reading about the couple I was re-inspired to jump on my online dating efforts and signed up for a dating website that seemed interesting to me http://www.blacksingles.com/. I'm a paying member (for at least a month) and this is HUGE for me. I have always said that I don't believe in online dating, but after hearing about the story of the couple in the article I'm willing to give it a shot. I'm also planning to pay for my profile on Yahoo Personals and maybe one other to broaden my horizons. I've had a few emails back and forth on Black Singles and a couple of bites on Yahoo.

I have a good feeling about this week folks. It's already started off the right way for me and I hope the trend continues. Thanks again for all the notes, IM's and phone calls about the blog. Keep them coming I love hearing from you. If you like what you're reading here become a follower of my blog if you haven't already. Even those of you who get this e-mail passed along by our mutual friends.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

Night on the town...

Hello my faithful readers:

First off I have to say TGIF! This week started off pretty quietly for me, hence my lack of blog activity. Now I'm just focused on getting myself out there again now that things are starting to warm up. I kicked things off with a TV Industry Networking party for which I was a part of the host committee. Prior to heading to the party MILF and I had a lovely dinner at Ditch Plains down in Tribeca. The food was good and we both thought it would be appropriate for future dates.

I expected the party to be a low key lounge type affair, but it turned out to be a pretty sexy party. I mean full of lots of beautiful people including, Adrien Grenier of Entourage fame. The line to get into the party was wrapped around the corner; for the first half of the night I was running around like a chicken with its head cut-off pulling all of my friends in from the long line when they texted me. Once everyone was in and had received their VIP passes I was able to take a breath and grab a drink at the bar.

As a part of the Host Committee I made it a point to work the room as much as possible. One thing about me is that when I'm in the mood I have no problems small talking with people no matter who they are, but the big BUT is I have to be in the mood. Despite the irritations I'd experienced at work that darkened my mood right before the party I was ready to have a good time. I met a few people over the course of the night and one guy really piqued my interest a guy we'll call "Youngun" because I found out later from a friend of mine that he's only like 25 or 26 years old. Can anyone say Cougar???

To be honest I really don't recall much of my conversation with "Youngun" because he was just so beautiful to me. I'd noticed him when I first walked into the party and thought he was security because he spent so much time standing all by himself near the entrance to the party. I never really saw him talking to anyone the entire time I was over that way, but when he finally made it into the back part of the room I stopped him to talk to him. I started out by asking him how he heard about the party. He explained one of his friends who works in PR for a jewelry firm had invited him, but then bailed last minute, but he decided to come. Now this entire time I'm trying to be cool and light, but in the end I was the aggressor in our little few minute chat. I mentioned to him that I thought he was very attractive (SO UNLIKE ME), then offered to introduce him to some of my friends so he wouldn't be so lonely.

One of my other friends DJD ended up walking over and apparently knows Youngun (or at least Youngun said he knew him). I left them together talking and continued to work the room, but before leaving him I handed him my business card and I told him coyly that I hoped he used it. I ended up chatting with my friend Brooke later that night and she said she finally figured out where she knew him from. Apparently they take a boxing class together, but she also broke the news to me that he was young too. Before he left for the night he made sure to say bye and give me a nice hug goodbye. Then this morning I woke up and couldn't remember his name, but I did remember how cute I thought he was... SIGH.

Throughout the course of the night I made a point to speak to as many men (and people) as possible and I exchanged business cards with quite a few. A couple have already dropped me nice e-mails or phone calls, most pertaining to some business opportunities, but all in I hope I can turn some of my new acquaintances into friends at least.

Tonight my friend JF and I are going to see Michael Ian Black at Caroline's and then I'm planning to hit up another party if I still have the energy afterwards. I also have a couple of other parties to go to this weekend - it is definitely birthday season now! I wish you all a safe and happy weekend. Please try stay warm if you're here in the NYC area. Next week I have a few plans lined up so there won't be as much lag in blog activity.

Mwuah,

Georgia Peach

PS - I haven't followed up with any of my speed daters nor have any called me yet either. I think I'll try it again soon with a more targeted group though.